No I haven't

Job 23: 10-12 But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold. 11 My feet have closely followed his steps; I have kept to his way without turning aside. 12 I have not departed from the commands of his lips; I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my daily bread

Job was a man of integrity, he was firm, straight, proud, humble. This man knew what it was ro follow God, He knew how to find God and loved doing it. He had faith in what God was doing in his life and stood his ground against anyone that came against him.

How many people can truly say they stand upright before God? How many can say they live like Job? Not many. I read this scripture and think i haven't closely followed his steps, i haven't kept his way, I haven't remained close to his commands, I haven't treasured his words.

No matter how much i wish i was like Job or no matter how much i wish i was like what people think i am, I'm not. I am indecisive, confused, lazy, and fearful. All things God doesn't want me to be. I yearn for all that to change and all i can do is wait for God to touch my spirit and change my weaknesses.

Lord,
You know the depths of my heart. You know the good the bad the ugly and the dirty. Please change my heart Oh God and make it ever new. I need your strength cause mine is gone. The strength to know your will before mine or anyone elses. The strength to make those hard decisions when i am fragile. Only you can help me.
I forever love you
Amen