Job 28:23-28 God understands the way to it and he alone knows where it dwells,
24 for he views the ends of the earth and sees everything under the heavens. 25 When he established the force of the wind and measured out the waters, 26 when he made a decree for the rain and a path for the thunderstorm, 27 then he looked at wisdom and appraised it; he confirmed it and tested it. 28 And he said to man,'The fear of the Lord—that is wisdom, and to shun evil is understanding.' "
During Jobs testing he was being taught more than he knew before. Even though healing would've was what he wanted the most it was wisdom that he needed and wisdom that he gained. When he was being mocked by his friends, he in turn was teaching them something. He was teaching them the importance of wisdom and what it truly means.
At times i believe i am using wisdom than i don't know what it was. Its hard for me at times lately to know the difference anymore. I get confused all the time, doubt myself, my decisions, i do things i know are 100% wrong - i just know I'm not my true self anymore and i don't know how to get it back. Fearing God is a start and through that He'll show me certain things. I don't know where to start to show Him that i do fear Him (this is my confusion)
Lord,
I was a different place once.A place of peace and freedom but I'm far away from there and i want to go back. I want to live there, eat, drink, love you there. I am changing and i don't like it and neither do you. Please draw closer to me, send me a map to your place. Guide me to you. I forever love you
Amen
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